REMEMBRANCE ..

The moment had finally arrived, the moment for which i was waiting for such a long period..It was today for which
I waiting from last three years, the day when I will finally meet all my school friends together in a park near our
dear old school. After 12th our school group had split and we all went to different colleges..But we were still in
touch for all this time..
Some of us planned a reunion after such a long time at a place suitable for most of us, so that maximum number
of people could turn up..Maximum number of people were informed about the reunion..
Afterall whatever we say, whatever we do, for most of us school memories are perhaps the most special ones
of our entire life..

I woke up early in the morning...I did not sleep well..The reason being high amount of nervousness
and excitement going through my head..
What bothered me the most or perhaps the only thing that bothered me was - ' Will she turn up ?
EVen if she did, will she recognise me ? Will I be able to talk to her ? ' ..Slowly the time passed with my
heartbeat increasing with every second passing..I tried to keep it cool but somehow I kept loosing confidence..
I even considered a thought of not attending the reunion..Somehow, someway i managed to gain some
confidence back and went away for the 'destination' with a hope to relive perhaps the best days of my life..

Because of nervousness I started out so early I reached the place fifteen minutes before time..As expected I was the
first one to reach..I had dressed myself in a simple fashion, I did not spend much time on it or rather I could not
spend time on it as my brain had stopped working since morning..I sat there on grass in complete solitude..I then
got lost in my own thoughts pulling out grass unconsciously..After considering what all had happnend from moring
I smiled when I thought logically about my stupidity of starting out early..

'Good to see you smile ! ' ..I glanced above as my heartbeat skipped a beat..There she stood dressed beautifully
looking simply gorgeous..I stood up nervously with my body shaking a bit..'Oh !! Thanks..Hi !' Thats all I could
manage..I nervously shook hand and just looked down at the grass..I did not have the courage to look into those eyes
and loose myself all over again...'Hi !Lets sit down here only' she said confidently..I sat down.My hearbeat was now
racing..My fear that she will not recognise me was over..But the fact that I had to face her alone was what made
me feel so underconfident..I did not have a clue as to how to start the conversation and what to say , when she said
'So ! How are you Ankur ? How are things at IIT Delhi ? ' ..I was blank..I did not have a clue as to how she knows
my college..I felt so embarassing when I couldnt manage to say anything for 15 seconds or so..I drew some confidence
from within and started of with confidence..' Well I am fine...College is going nice..Nicely settled there and
enjoying the college life entirely..What about you ? You are doing MBBS from punjab..right ? 'I said..I kind of
had a sigh of relief as slowly my nervousness was easing out, i was kind of getting a bit calmer though I was still
nervous..'Well I am fine too..My college is going good besides the fact that there are too much of studies there..
We still somehow manage to find time for enjoyment you see..'she said..We then started of with our conversation
where she did much of the talking..I came to know about her hostel,her friends, her college and I told her my
interests, future plans etc etc..Then she said that she was also a bit nervous to come and thus she also started
early..That boosted my confidence up a bit and I was finally into relaxed state of mind..
We then took our conversation into some movies related stuff and some talks about those beautiful old good days.

'Why is nobody else here till now? ' She said after fifteen minutes..'No clue..' I said..'What about a cup of coffee
and some snacks ?' I said..'I am starving' ..I told her..She with her charming smile agreed and we both walked along
the park together towards a place where all the students of the school came to have some snacks after the school ..
The walk with he was perhaps something i longed from I dont know when ..It was an irreplacable gift that
god gave me..I could feel her presence,smell her presence..This whole thing gave my heart a lift..I felt serene
and divine..
Along the walk we chatted different stuff but all along I kept thinking - 'Should I or shouldn't I ?' 'Its the first
and last oppurtunity you have ' 'What is she slaps ? ' 'What is she has a boy friend ? ' etc etc..

FInally we reache the restaurant..There we ate together..I had more
attention on her than my food..I once brought an empty cup to drink a glass of water and once took out a spoon to
drink coffee..Both of the time my accompanist smiled and left me embarassed..Anyway the things moved one, we chatted
about every stuff you can imagine..From sports, to music, to life, to future, to friends , to food to everything..

With twenty more minutes over we went back to park and to our surprise there was still nobody who turned up in our
absence..Then we decided to call them..I called my friends and some of them said sorry that they will not be able to come.
Some said they will be able to come only in afternoon..Some of the girl refused..So all in all after 15 minutes of
phone calls most of the people who would turn said that they will take atleast an hour to reach here..She smiled
when I told her the details of every phone call..'Looks like we are still the only sincere people in the class !'..
She said with a smile on her face..It was her greatest ability, she could smile and make you feel that life is
beautiful in every situation possible..
I must tell you I had a liking for her since I dont know when , but well past 5 years I have been
attracted only to this girl..She was like a person for whom I could do anything..I never had any plans of
having a relationship with her, or to tell her etc etc..But what all I wanted was to
know her..
Whether is she still the same...Whether is she still that simple, cute ,innocent girl at whom I stared
in classes and assemblies ..Is she still the same person whom I notice talking in class, smiling and playing
with her friends..' Is she still the same '..I kept thinking..
'Well lets go and meet our teachers,we have a lot of time to spend till they turn up '..she said..Though I wanted
to spend time with her alone but of course you dot get what you desire everytime..So we went to school on foot,
remembering the old school instances, some joyful memories came back and we kind of relived what were supposedly the
best days of our life..
Meeting the old teachers is always a pleasure..The smile one their face, their suggestions,
their wishes are always so so nice..With small tears in our eyes as we parted off with the school which was
no longer ours..
I tried to cheer her up along the way and she gave me a smile with water still in her eyes..At that moment i wished
that world had stopped..I wanted to capture this scene forever..She looked so so so beautiful that it was beyond words,
beyond material, beyond everything..
But then the time had to move one..We went back slowly to the park and finally some
people had turn up in groups..Six of them came..We shook hands..Hugged each other and chatted...With more people
joining us with every minute..After an hour of coming back to the park almost all the expected people had turn up
and then we joked around, shouted in park and perhaps we were back to that child age again..We were letting that kid
come out of us..We played games like the old favourite truth and dare ..This whole feeling of being back to that
age of 17 was a great feeling ..While playing, while enjoying I still kept noticing her, twice or thrice my eyes found
hers..I immediately started looking somwhere else whenever such a thing happened ..
After this we all sat down and chatted..Everyone was interested to know how many of
us were still single..Few of us including me raised hand..I saw her hand raised too !!..
My heart again skipped a beat
as I finally knew that she was single..With this whole big detailed discussion about everyone we gave our contacts
to the ones who wanted and finally we all decided to part off again..

Here I was at the same moment again..Should I or should not I..Am I being foolish ? Is this love ? If not can this
be love ? With all these thoughts hitting me heavily on head, people started to leave..I said goodbye to many of
friends absent-mindedly..My hands were numb again...Again the things were looking out of control..Nervousness,
anxiety all hit me at once..
'Ankur will you please accompany me till my home ?? You are the one who lives nearest you see..' She said politely..
'Sure'..I said nervously..Is it the right time ? ...We walked along the park together but this time no one of us was
talking..She looked a bit worried too..I could not gather the courage to even speak..We took an auto and finally
there we were at 5 min walk distance from her house..'My house is..' she said when I absent-mindedly said 'near from
here..First left and then right..Ya I know ..' ..Her eyes were wide..Her face blank..'How do you know ? How do you
know Ankur ? ' ..I then realised what i said..I looked down..I avoided her eye-contact..How could I tell her that I was so mad
about her that I had her phone number and address imprinted in my memory..How could i tell her that i wandered
sometimes near her house just to see a glimpse of her ..How could I ?? Thats when a tear fell from my eye..I could
not control my emotions..It felt so bad about leaving her a..True, she was
never mine but this whole day, she was with me..I could not even have the courage to think of loosing her sight,
loosing her smile..loosing her forever...I do not know what she understood of my tear,
but all she did was that she walked away ..Walked away from my life..From me...forever....!



This is my remembrance of one most special day of my life ! What happened afterwards is for you to decide .. !